The small print?

You've all seen it but have you ever read it?  Almost every TV commercial these days comes with its small print, often just a line of text saying "conditions apply", but sometimes paragraphs of obscure regulations and caveats.  What follows are a few of the bits of small print found on the weekend of the 11th-13th November 2011 on British TV.  Some of it gives health warnings or usage instructions; some reveals the less-than-impressive details of the money-off offers (the high original price may have only been in place a week or two); other texts explain the methodology behind grandiose claims; or reveal the extra cash you'll have to spend to get something useful.

Screens simulated. Sequence shortened. High speed internet, webcams, mobile plan, additional programs and fees required for some features. (Microsoft OS and web services)

7% fibre. Enjoy as part of a healthy balanced diet & active lifestyle. 30g serving = 9% of sugar GDA. (Coco Pops breakfast cereal)

Scale speed 770 kmh. (GX Buggy toy)

Sold separately. Battle fortress around £40. (Zibits toy)

Batteries not included. Adult assembly required. (Elefun game)

Subject to availability. Selected UK Stores. (Clarkson Powered Up DVD)

Not game footage. Game sold separately. (Elder Scrolls V game/X-Box console)

Annual global sales 7/09 - 6/10. Ends 22/11. See in store for details. Selected stores. (Olay beauty product/Superdrug store)

£50 with any Estee Lauder fragrance purchase. While stocks last. (Estee Lauder Beautiful fragrance)

A few rules apply.  Ofcom Market Report. (3 mobile phone plan)

At participating restaurants only. Drinks may vary. Oreo is a registered trademark of Kraft foods used under licence. (KFC meal options)

For the facts: drinkaware.co.uk (Press 81 liquor)

Antibacterial handwash. Use biocides safely. Always read the label and product information before use. (Dettol handwash)

12 place setting tested. uSwitch.com prices used. On selected Bosch dishwashers at participating retailers. Ends 20th January. Terms & Conditions apply. (Bosch dishwashers)

16+. Prices include VAT & P&P. Cost of bid varies. Cost of bids included. Savings against RRP. Pay to bid auction site. (Madbid.com auction website)

Active City Stop is active at speeds up to 19mph. Optional features available at extra costs on selected models, see your Ford Dealer for details. (Ford Focus)

Excludes Trax bikes. Selected bikes only. (Halfords stores bicycle department)

18+ (Daily Mail newspaper reader offer)

£349. (struckout) £649. Higher price 1st - 10th Nov. Ends 16th Nov. £269. (struckout) £449. Higher price 3rd - 9th Nov. Ends 17th Nov. (Comet stores)

UK residents and 16+ only. Competition closes: 13/11/11. Full terms at tvterms.co.uk. (Gillette razors)

Associated with dandruff. (Head & Shoulders shampoo for itchy scalps)

Based on December 2010 survey. Funds sent within one hour, if approved between midnight and 10 pm. Maximum of £1,000 for first time customers. 25% off finance charge from which APR is calculated. Approval subject to status. Approvals take less than 30 minutes in most cases. Representative 1734% APR. Online discount. Cannot be combined with other offers. Terms and conditions apply. (QuickQuid money lending service)

While stocks last. Mystery product also available at larger Boots stores. (Boots beauty product promotion)

Selected products and stores. Subject to availability. Enjoy wine responsibly. Offer runs Thursday to Tuesday. (M&S meal offer)

18+. No deposit necessary. Non-withdrawable £10 free bet. Standard network charges and terms apply www.gambleaware.co.uk (Sky Bet gambling)

Fairy, Flash & Febreze will donate £150,000 to Make-A-Wish foundation this Christmas. Charity registration numbers (England & Wales) 296572 (Scotland) SCO37479 (Ireland) CHY15267. (Fairy/Flash/Febreze cleaning products charity appeal)

With dry food always give your cat plenty of water. (IAMS dry cat food)

Toys shown £4.24 to £77.24. Selected lines. Ends Tuesday. Some batteries excluded. Ends Tuesday. NPD Customer Survey, 200 transactions, 2010-11. (Argos stores toy offer)

(C) 2011 Kodak.  Based on lowest total ink replacement costs, inkjet printers. Q3 2011 pricing. See printkodak.co.uk. RRP August 2011. (Kodak printers)

Keeps on working for up to 12 hours. Research results - 80% of 130 women. (Simple beauty product)

£659 total separate selling price from 5/8 - 10/9/11. £649 from 17/9 - 12/10/11 AMD Dual Core E2 3000M Accelerated Processor with AMD Radeon HD6380G Discrete-Class Graphics. Currys only. £199 from 20/10 - 9/11/11. (Currys/PC World electronics stores)

Selected UK stores. Subject to availability. Delivery charges may apply online. Toy prices from £34.16-£90. tesco.com/direct. (Tesco stores games offer)

Youth Code day + serum tested on 194 women. (L'Oreal beauty product)

18+ only. Terms and conditions apply. (uniformdating.com dating website)

In taste tests 181 like Lindt. 86% of them also liked Aldi. (Aldi supermarket own-brand chocolate animals)